“If you turn left here, we will get there more quickly.”
“No, I drive this all the time, this way is quicker.”
“I just drove this yesterday, and it is quicker if you turn left.”
Voice inflections change. Eyes roll. The mood of the trip just changed.
“You never reached out to me.”
“I reached out first, last time. I was waiting for you this time.”
“What a joke! You never reach out to me first. I always have to be the one to initiate.”
Words get harsher. The sound of pain makes its way through the conversation.
“About ten years ago we went and visited Uncle Joe.”
“That was not ten years ago. It was only eight.”
“It was ten years! I remember cuz it was close to his 70th birthday.”
Argument ensues. Tension grows.
What is it about us and our great need to be “RIGHT”? Even to the point we are willing to argue about topics that add no value to our daily lives. To the point that often times, we don’t even remember the topic of the initial argument. Years ago, my husband and I went to a marriage retreat, and speaker, Tom Harmon, gave this wise advice: “Give up the RIGHT to be RIGHT.”
What? You mean when I am RIGHT, I can just let “it” go and allow the other person to be RIGHT? Yes, it is possible. And it is a valuable tool to use in a marriage, as well as in any other relationship. When we relinquish this RIGHT, we are sacrificing self by putting the other person’s needs first. Because to be honest, many (I realize there are exceptions) of the arguments we have, are not worth battling over. They are not worth damaging the relationship. They are not worth hurting the other person. They are not worth the journey down the long ugly road. They are not worth damaging any children within earshot.
Perhaps turning left was quicker, but did the argument add value to the relationship? Maybe the other person didn’t reach out last time; are we prepared to lose the relationship over who is RIGHT. And maybe it was only eight years ago since we visited Uncle Joe, but wasn’t the goal of the conversation to set up a time to go visit him again?
I’m certainly not going to say it’s easy to relinquish the RIGHT to be RIGHT. My husband will testify to the fact that I don’t find it easy; in fact, he is much better at it than I. But I will continue to remind myself that it’s not about who is RIGHT. It’s about loving and honoring the other person, and investing in the building of relationships.
Bible Verses for today's Marriage Monday
Let no corrupt talk come from your mouths, but only that which is used to build others up. Eph 4:29
So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, Matthew 7:12
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32
Sign up here to receive reminders and links to Marriage Monday and Misty's monthly devotional newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/7844a4ba7f8b/welcome I hope you have a wonderful week and that you remember to prioritize your marriage...because it matters.
Do you find Marriage Monday helpful? If so, I’d love to hear from you. Message me. Comment on the blog. And give a “thumbs up” and share. Thank you!
Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and three granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:
Sign up here to receive reminders and links to Marriage Monday and Misty's monthly devotional newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/7844a4ba7f8b/welcome
Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14
Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064
Misty Cramer © 2024
Do you find Marriage Monday helpful? If so, I’d love to hear from you. Message me. Comment on the blog. And give a “thumbs up” and share. Thank you!
Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and three granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:
Sign up here to receive reminders and links to Marriage Monday and Misty's monthly devotional newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/7844a4ba7f8b/welcome
Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14
Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064
Misty Cramer © 2024
Todd and I enjoyed an entire Saturday at home this past weekend. With two sons getting married in the next month, it was a wonderful weekend to soak in one another before the wonderful weeks ahead place some extra commitments on our plate.
By Saturday evening, we had both spent time going in and out of the house, sort of rotating between work around the house and relaxation. As the sun was beginning to set, we took a walk around the yard and landed in the chairs overlooking the water. We soaked in the sunset, the sounds of the birds surrounding us, and the warmth of one another’s bodies. I sat nestled under his arm with my head resting on his shoulder, and closed my eyes. After close to 40 years of marriage, his shoulder was still one of my favorite places to rest. It always brings me peace, comfort, strength, assurance.
In the silence, my mind began to reflect upon the many ways I am grateful for this man. The list in my mind just kept growing. From his hard work around the yard to his love for his family. From his passion for ministry to his desire to provide for us. From his hunger for personal spiritual growth to his desire to see others know Jesus. From the way he looks at me when I’m being silly to the way he opens the door for me when we go out. The list continued. And then I lifted my head from his shoulder and looked into his eyes.
“Babe,” I said with an inquisitive smile, “Do you ever just look at me and think of how thankful you are for me?”
He kept my gaze and softly responded, “That’s what I was just doing.” And he kissed me.
It is so important in our marriages to share with one another the gratitude we feel for the other. Life is crazy busy and if we aren’t intentional, it just won’t happen. It isn’t necessarily because we aren’t thankful or grateful for our spouse; it could truly because we aren’t making it a priority to leave ourselves time to lean into the art of gratitude for him/her.
I know I mention “priority” almost every week in my Marriage Monday, but that’s because it’s important! We must prioritize what’s important. And it is of utmost importance to share with your spouse the gratitude you feel for them. Unfortunately, you might be making a list of all the things he/she does that bother you. Or maybe you’re not in a good spot in your marriage right now, so you are stopping yourself from even allowing anything pure and good about them to enter your mind. I challenge you to stop that today. Satan loves to grab our train of thought and head it down a negative direction. Before we know it, it’s hard to get dug out of that rut. I’m asking you today, to make an intentional decision to get out of the negative rut. And to make a gratitude attitude adjustment this week. I have faith in you! You can do it! Check out the Practical Tips below to get started on the journey to strengthening your marriage. Because your marriage matters!
Practical Tips for Strengthening Your Marriage this Week
*Pause and pray. Ask God to forgive you for any negative thoughts you have been holding against your spouse, and ask Him to renew your mind with thoughts of gratitude.
*Grab a piece of paper and write down at least five characteristics in which you are thankful for your spouse. Do this each day this week, so you have a list tucked away to refer to when you need the reminder.
*Leave your spouse a note on his/her mirror, pillow, coffee pot, vehicle (you get the idea) that tells him/her specific areas in which you are thankful for him/her. Do this several times this week.
*Take your spouse by the hand, or in your arms, look him/her in the eyes and tell him/her, “I am so grateful for ___________. Thank you for caring for me/us in this way.” Do this several times this week.
*Have a conversation with your spouse and discuss how you both can move forward with making the sharing of gratitude a priority. This could be making gratitude lists and setting aside a special time to share them with one another. Perhaps you could commit to sharing something you are thankful for each night before you go to bed. There are many ideas you could implement; enjoy creating them and soak in the blessings that sharing your gratitude for your spouse brings to your marriage.
Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and three granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:
Sign up here to receive reminders and links to Marriage Monday and Misty's monthly devotional newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/7844a4ba7f8b/welcome
Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14
Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064
Misty Cramer © 2024
In the early years of my marriage, when life got overwhelming, my “go-to” was to withdraw. And by this, I mean withdraw emotionally and physically. I wanted to be alone, go hide in my bedroom, and if necessary, curl up into a fetal position on my bed (or floor in some cases). And then, well then, I would cry.
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see how this could lead to some problems, confusion, and frustration for my man and I. My newly married hubby wanted to offer comforting words to me; I didn’t want to listen to him. My newly married hubby wanted to hold me; I didn’t want him to touch me. My newly married hubby wanted to know what was wrong; I didn’t want to talk. The list goes on.
As we continued to grow and strengthen our relationship, things began to change. We began to communicate more clearly with one another. Walls began to crumble, as we shared our fears and hurts, our pasts, and our dreams for the future.
A beautiful thing happened through this growing process. I began to open up and let him know when I felt I was heading into one of those overwhelming spots. In fact, he began to pick up on my subtle (and even unconscious) cues that “told” him I was heading into one of those situations. I began to allow him to speak words of truth to me. He began to learn when to not speak, and when to just listen. I began to long for him to hold me; he began to ask if he could do so. I began to share what I was experiencing; and he learned when to ask, and when to give me space.
Marriage is a delicate dance, isn’t it. It’s easy to step on the toes of the one dancing closely with us. It’s easy to make mistakes in timing. Or to not trust the other with the dips in our lives.
And yet, when we are willing to put the time in to learn how to navigate that dance, it is such a beautiful thing. It doesn’t happen overnight. It takes patience. And practice. And persistence. But, it can get to the point where you are truly enjoying the dance…and actually pretty good at it too.
Now, forty years into our marriage, our dance looks so much different than it did in those early years. You will be hard pressed to find me sneaking off alone to our room gearing up to get into that fetal position. The reasons are varied. But basically, Todd can tell when I’m heading down that road, often before I am even thinking about it. He can pick up on my mood changes. The frequency of tears shed. The lack of laughter.
And I am able to share my heart with him. I trust him with every part of my being. So, when I am disappointed, fearful, or sad, I can share that with him.
The picture of me, alone in our room, on the bed in a ball is no more. Instead, the picture you will see is a woman leaning on the shoulder of her man, as he embraces her. Tears trickling down her cheek, as he asks her if she just needs space to cry or if he should offer some words of encouragement. And, the dance continues.
Practical Tips for Strengthening Your Marriage this Week
*Identify whether your “go to” is to withdraw from your pain or share your pain with your spouse.
*Ask your spouse if s/he thinks you have identified yourself correctly in regards to the above.
*Share with one another examples of why you think this about yourself and/or the other person. Remember, this is a discussion to encourage openness, not to shame the other for not opening up more quickly.
*Ask your spouse to share a specific area of his/her life in which you could help him/her to be more open.
*Ask your spouse to share with you some tips on how s/he could identify the beginning symptoms of when you are starting to withdraw.
*Pray for your spouse today. If s/he will pray with you in person, do that. If not, pray for them on your own. Below is a prayer you can use if you’d like:
Heavenly Father, I thank you for the gift you have given me in my spouse. I want to grow closer to my husband/wife. I want to connect with him/her in a more meaningful and deep way. Please give me the ears to hear and eyes to see when s/he is in pain or starting to withdraw from me. Give me the direction to proceed forward in a way that honors my spouse and you, as I walk alongside my spouse through the situation s/he is walking right now. Thank you Lord, for directing us and for strengthening our marriage even right now, as I say this prayer. In Jesus Name, Amen
Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and three granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:
Sign up here to receive reminders and links to Marriage Monday and Misty's monthly devotional newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/7844a4ba7f8b/welcome
Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14
Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064
Misty Cramer © 2024
During our Annual 4th of July Family Weekend (four generations now), we finish the weekend with a church service in our yard. My parents and Todd and I live on about 7 acres of land, which has a large pond on one side of our houses and the Bay on the other side of our houses. This makes for a beautiful setting for all of our weekend activities, including our Worship by the Bay, which we hold on Sunday morning before people pack up to head back home.
I awoke on Sunday morning feeling grateful for the family who had come and for all God did over the weekend. His presence was so evident throughout every piece of the weekend…games, conversations, bonfires, and meals. I was a good-exhausted, you might say.
Todd and I sat in our chairs that we had placed in our “church” for the morning. The breeze was blowing ever so slightly. The water in front of us had just a ripple of movement. Our son, Harrison, and one of our daughter-in-law’s, Kya, were preparing to begin the music. Another son, Micah, was ready to open the service in prayer. Todd and I held hands, as we watched others bring their chairs as they made their way to church.
The worship music began and gratitude consumed me once again. What a gift to be in this spot with four generations of family worshiping together. My heart was full. As the music came to a close, our youngest son stood and preached the Word. His message penetrated the hearts of each individual. Once again, I was overwhelmed with God’s goodness.
After the closing prayer, another of our sons, Taylor, (we have five) stood to make an announcement. “As you may know, my parents recently celebrated their 40th Wedding Anniversary. My Dad has asked if I help him surprise my mom by leading them through a renewal of their wedding vows today.”
I was in shock! I absolutely had no idea this was happening. I looked up at Todd, whose eyes were already glistening with tears, and wondered if life could get any better than this. He stood and extended his hand out to me to take me to the front, where we would renew our vows.
And, because I’m one for full disclosure, I said, “Oh my gosh! Do I have time to go to the bathroom? I have been holding it so much for the last 20 minutes and I don’t think I can wait.”
I took off running for the house (the best I could with a full bladder), as everyone laughed, and Todd and Taylor stood at the front waiting for my return.
I did return. I joined My Man at the front, as he opened with sharing from his heart about our marriage and this special plan to surprise me. And surprise me, he definitely did.
Before Taylor began, Todd shared how he secretly went to my Bible and found the notecard with the vows he had written to me 40 years ago. He wrote them at 19 years old, the morning of our wedding. His mom had laminated them for us, and I’ve kept them in my Bible since then.
He shared how he was going to rewrite some vows, but then read what he had written all those years ago, and noticed, they still hold true today. So, with tears streaming down both of our cheeks, he read the 40-year-old vows to me once again:
Today I will marry my best friend, my love, and the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with.
Our love for each other has grown each day from the first time we said-I love you.
Our relationship also has grown. With each problem or conflict, we overcome, our relationship gains strength.
I will do my best to make you happy. I will work hard so that we can grow in our marriage and in God.
Ahead of us are good times as well as bad, but with our commitment to each other and to God we will make it through.
We are taking the biggest step in our lives-a celebration of our love and commitment to each other. I’m as happy as anyone could ever be.
Misty, I love you.
Todd was right. Those 40-year-old vows remained relevant and were the perfect words for our renewal. It was wonderful to hear them anew.
Taylor then mentioned something similar to his Dad. He said he too, was going to look for some new vows, made for a renewal, and yet, he settled back into the original vows. The traditional vows we took 40 years ago.
We repeated the vows to one another. We said “I do” again. And we once again pledged, “til death do us part”. (And then we got to kiss!)
The stark differences between that day and this one was evident to all who were in attendance at both. And yet, a couple things remained steadfast. We were surrounded by our loved ones, and we continue to feel God’s presence and see evidence of His work in and through our lives. And for that, my gratitude overflows all over again.
Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and three granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:
Sign up here to receive reminders and links to Marriage Monday and Misty's monthly devotional newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/7844a4ba7f8b/welcome
Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14
Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064
Misty Cramer © 2024
Do seasonal transitions come easy for you? They certainly don’t for me. As I wandered around my house this week, picking up little toys and hair ties, and swooshing balloons across the floor, my heart ached. They were reminders that Summer was coming to a close and Fall was soon to begin.
Our family had the most marvelous of summers. We started right out with two of our sons getting married. It was absolutely wonderful to experience those unions. Weddings also meant there were some really great family gatherings, which I love and treasure. We then we headed into our 9th Annual July 4th Family Extravaganza. That meant even more family time. We had trips up north to see family. We had our South Carolina family come to Michigan for several weeks. The opportunities for fun, conversation, and laughter seemed endless this summer.
And yet, this week, the time arrived for that phase of life to come to a close. Did I mention how much I dislike that?
The family activities wrapped up, as the last of our family, including two of our granddaughters, our daughter-in-law and our son, loaded up and pulled out of the driveway on Monday. And this grandma shed some tears. Transitions are hard, especially when they include good-byes.
Today there were no morning conversations with my son and daughter-in-law.
There was no pitter patter of our granddaughters little feet making their way down the stairs. There were no snuggles on the couch before the day was to begin.
There would be no more setting up for movie nights. Or making popcorn. Or choosing a candy to add to that popcorn. (Does anyone else add M & M’s or Skittles to their popcorn?)
The pond will remain still, without the endless swimming and paddleboard rides.
The bonfire pit won’t be as active.
The jars for catching fireflies will remain empty.
The “grandma tears” came again at 2:00 pm when I was picking up some random item they left lying on the living room. And even now, as I write this. The sadness does fade. It takes a bit, but that’s ok. Giving myself time to sit in the “loss” of summer, of noise, of family is healthy for me. And it takes me through the memories of all the wonderful things that happened this summer.
What transition are you preparing for today? Do you have a little one heading to kindergarten? Are you dropping a child off at college? Maybe you’ve had a summer break from work and you’re preparing to head back this fall. Possibly, you’ve had a different type of loss; the loss of a marriage; the physical loss of a loved one; the loss of a job.
All of those changes mandate a transition. Some are easier than others. All can be a challenge and bring an array of emotions. I want to remind you today that we serve a God who is walking with you during every transition. Deuteronomy 31:8 says, “The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”
The changes in your life and the transitions you are walking through at this very moment are no surprise to God. He is not caught off guard by your circumstances. He is not puzzled by your pain. He is not silenced by your sadness.
He is near to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18), prepared to give rest to the weary (Matthew 11:28), and provide strength (Isaiah 41:10) for each one of us.
I pray that whatever transition you are walking through right now, that you would rest in the arms of the One who has held your past and holds your future. And as for my transition, I am going to praise Him for a splendid summer, and lean into whatever fabulous fall plans He has for me. (Yes, I may shed a few more tears and I definitely will be counting down until I get to see my family again.)
Scripture and Prayers for You Today
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10
So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy. John 16:22
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans15:13
The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them. Psalm 145:18-19
Heavenly Father, I am going through some challenging transitions right now. It’s hard for me to let go of the past and embrace the future. I ask that you would walk before me, light the path for me, and prepare me in whatever ways needed for the road that is ahead. I love you Lord, and thank you for your goodness and grace. Amen
Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and three granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:
Sign up here to receive reminders and links to Marriage Monday and Misty's monthly devotional newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/7844a4ba7f8b/welcome
Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14
Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064
Misty Cramer © 2024
“Is this all there is?”
“Every day it’s the same ol, same ol. Where did the spontaneity go?”
“Why isn’t our marriage exciting anymore?”
Is it time to dig your way out of the marriage ruts? See if you relate to any of the scenarios below:
Husband and wife arrive home from work. They both dive into the normal routine of what happens every single day at this time. Someone throws dinner together. Someone helps the kids with homework. Someone is texting. Someone is on the computer continuing their work day from home. When they finally sit down to dinner, they are crabby and it impacts the kiddo’s who are hungry, tired, and in need of some attention.
One spouse has been home and has dinner made for the family. The other spouse comes in the door. Instead of greeting one another, they walk by the other as if s/he is a stranger they passed on the sidewalk.
They climb into bed at night. The conversation is limited, if it happens at all. One grabs a book, and the other picks up the phone. Time passes, and the lamps go out. Thoughts of a kiss goodnight, are just that…thoughts.
One spouse is "in the mood" and the other isn't. The same sexual routine plays out just like it always does. No variety. No passion.
It doesn't have to be that way...in any of these scenarios. And yet, they keep replaying in homes all around the country...day after day. Which scenario plays out within the walls of your home? Or perhaps you have one I didn't mention. Does it leave you longing for more from your marriage?
Sometimes those unhealthy scenarios creep in over a long period of time, and other times, they develop rather quickly. Sometimes, we just aren’t paying attention and being intentional, and the next thing we know, we have created poor habits within our marriage.
Just as those poor habits were created, they also can be tossed out and replaced with healthy ones. But, it does take intentionality. The change won’t happen without putting some effort into it.
A while ago, Todd and I got into a bedtime routine I wasn’t fond of. We unintentionally developed the habit of climbing into bed and scrolling, reading, or watching a tv program on our phones. We didn’t even recognize this behavior right away. Then one night, it was like a light bulb went on. What are we doing? Why are we ending our day like this? We re-evaluated. We decided we enjoy praying together before bed. We decided that yes, we both do enjoy watching some tv before bed. We decided we wanted to make sure we were giving the other a kiss before we rolled over and went to sleep. And so, those adjustments were made. We pray. We decide together what show we would like to watch together. And when it’s time for lights out, we give each other a kiss good night.
I’m not saying this is the best bedtime routine for every married couple. But I am saying, examine your routines and see if you’re both happy with them. If you’re not, then have some discussion and re-evaluate. Try something new. Discover what brings happiness and contentment to both of you. And enjoy this process of discovery. Remember, your marriage matters.
And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Hebrews 10:24
Practical Tips for Strengthening Your Marriage this Week
* Reflect on the rut or unhealthy routine that you and your spouse have become stuck in.
* Talk together about alternative options you both would enjoy, rather than staying stuck in your current situation.
* Identify the specific areas of your life where your marriage tends to fall into ruts. Examples of these areas: evening routines, meals, sexual intimacy, date nights, vacations, conversations, family time
*Choose one of those areas to focus upon, and begin implementing those changes today.
Todd and Misty are certified Marriage Mentors, and are committed to helping others strengthen their marriage. Thank you for reading this blog. If you found it helpful, please like, message, comment, or pass it on to someone else.
Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 40 years and they have five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, four daughters-in-law, and three granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:
Sign up here to receive reminders and links to Marriage Monday and Misty's monthly devotional newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/7844a4ba7f8b/welcome
Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14
Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064
Misty Cramer © 2024
Do you remember, as a child, being in a large crowd, straining to see something special? And then realizing that all you could see were the backs and behinds of the people in front of you?
That is, until an adult noticed you struggling to see. They lifted you up, placed you on their shoulders, and suddenly you were higher than everyone else. You realized you had the best view in the place!
On my journey through Luke today, I was reading Luke 19, and was considering what the view must have been like for Zacchaeus on that day he decided to climb the tree. You see, the bible tells us that Zacchaeus was “short”. So, when the crowds began to gather to see Jesus, he was seeing the backs and behinds of the people in front of him. However, he may have been short in stature, but he was most certainly not short in creativity and ingenuity. He found a tree. And he climbed it. He suddenly had the best view in the place! How awesome is that! Not only was Zacchaeus able to see Jesus, but Jesus saw Zacchaeus!
As Zacchaeus is up there enjoying the view, perhaps waving at the people below him, Jesus sees him. He not only sees him, but he greets him. And he not only greets him, but Jesus invites himself over to dinner at Zacchaeus’ house! Wow! That climb up into the sycamore tree was so worth it!
Zacchaeus did what hopefully any of us would do, “came down at once and welcomed him gladly”.
Today, I pose this question-how eager are we to see Jesus? Are we hungering Him to the point that we are willing to “climb the sycamore tree”? To do something unusual, so we can see Him more clearly? To go out of our way to hear His voice?
Everywhere we look, it seems there are currently big crowds. Restaurants. The expressway. Stores. It takes some effort on our parts, to find a way to see Jesus through the crowds and chaos. But when we do, when we put in that effort, when we climb that tree--the view is so beautiful. The relationship with Jesus is so sweet. We see Him. He sees us. We are reminded that He longs to sit at our table and share in conversation with us. We are reminded, as Zacchaeus was, that He “came to seek and to save the lost”.
Today's blog is teaching from Luke 19:1-10. Enjoy reading the full story on your own.
Prayer
Heavenly Father, as I navigate this busy season, I don't want to forget You in the midst of it all. I want to hunger for you. I want to chase you. I want to climb to the tallest tree, so I can see and hear you more clearly. Come, Lord Jesus, sit with me. So, I can give you praise and thanks for coming to earth to seek and save someone like me. Amen
Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 40 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, four daughters-in-law, and three granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:
Sign up here to receive reminders and links to Marriage Monday and Misty's monthly devotional newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/7844a4ba7f8b/welcome
Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14
Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064
Misty Cramer © 2024
My heart hurts today. It hurts for many of you. My friends out there who are struggling with deep pain. The world is going on with the hustle and bustle of Christmas, and you are holding on by a thread. You’re doing your best to smile as you check out of the store. You’re saying the words, “Merry Christmas”, and yet you feel anything but “merry”. You’re hiding the tears, as people mention their families gathering for Christmas. You’re forcing yourself to get up and go, to move forward, when everything in you wants to stop. I see you, Friend. And I love you. More importantly, God sees you. And He loves you.
To my friends who are crawling instead of walking. Crying instead of laughing. You are seen. And you are loved.
To my friends who have lost a loved one, those of you who will sit through Christmas with that empty chair filled with memories staring back at you, you are seen. You are loved.
To my friends who have a family member who is distant, perhaps writing you out of their story, your pain is real. You are seen, and you are loved.
To the family who just lost a wife and mom, we are reeling with you. You are seen, and you are loved.
To the one spending this holiday season in the hospital, wishing to be with your family around the Christmas tree, know that you are seen. And you are loved.
To the family sitting alongside their loved ones in the hospital, wondering if you have enough strength to support your loved one on their health journey, you are seen. And you are loved.
To the couple who lost their baby before he could take his first breath, we mourn with you. You are seen. And you are loved.
To my friends who are silently struggling with addiction, those who will watch the food and drinks pass by them, as the desire to partake grows stronger by the minute, you are seen. You are loved.
To my friends who sit alone this holiday season, remembering the days when your home was full of love and laughter, you too are seen. And you are loved.
Although our world is much different than it was 2000 years ago, when Jesus was born, the pain remains the same. The hopelessness was evident. Sickness darkened the doors of families. Wayward family members impacted the group around the dinner table. Loneliness was present. These are not new hurts. They are hurts that a living God saw, as the perfect world He created became filled with pain. But our God saw that! Just as He sees every one of us. He saw the need for a Savior. He saw the need for the brokenness to be healed. For loneliness to be replaced with joy. He saw the need for families to be restored. For addictions to be broken. He saw the need for healing. He saw the need for eternal life, so we could sit at the table once again with those we lost. He saw…and He sees.
Our loving and faithful God chose to send His Son, Jesus, into a lost and painfilled world. He did that for you. He did that for me. Because He sees us. And He loves us.
My hope and prayer for you this Christmas season is that if you are one of the people who are hurting, allow Him and others to walk this journey with you. Let people minister to you; that’s what our loving God does for us. And if you’re one of the people who are doing well, then please keep your eyes open for those who need you this holiday season. In Matthew 9:37 it says, "The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few; therefore, pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest". May we be one of the laborers He sends to walk alongside the hurting this holiday season.
If you or your family need some extra prayers this Christmas, please let me know. I’d be honored to pray for you.
Scriptures of Hope
Today, I encourage you to choose a verse or two, write them down, place them somewhere in your home where they’ll be visible, and allow God to minister to your heart through His Words.
God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1
See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him. 1 John 3:1
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. “By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” John 13:34-35
This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. 1 John 3:16
God is faithful, who has called you into fellowship with his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord. I Corinthians 1:9
Isaiah 43:4: God sees us as precious and honored, and loves us so much that he would exchange nations for our life.
You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. Psalm 139:1
But you, Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness. Psalm 86:15
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147:3
Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 40 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, four daughters-in-law, and three granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:
Sign up here to receive a free devotion, 5 Steps for Walking with God through Everyday Moments: https://mailchi.mp/7844a4ba7f8b/welcome
Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14
Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064
Misty Cramer © 2024