Marriage Monday: The Invisible Backpack

It’s been over 39 years since I went down the aisle and made the vow “til death do us part”. As I think back on that day, I consider the number of unrealistic expectations I took with me down that aisle. It was almost as if I had an invisible backpack strapped to my body…and inside it held the ugly and unquestionably problematic…unrealistic expectations.  

Oh, I am not even sure I was consciously taking these unrealistic expectations with me down the aisle. Nonetheless, they were there. And some of them were going to do their best to create some problems in my marriage.

Not all expectations are negative ones. But for the purpose of this post, the focus is on the unrealistic and unhealthy expectations. For me, these were expectations I had thrown into my backpack as I grew up. Expectations that my hubby would do jobs just like my Dad did them. Expectations that he would know birthdays were an important event and worthy of gift giving and celebration. Expectations that he would know when I was in need of some quality time. Expectations of him understanding my desire to pray together. The list could go on and on.

The reality is, my expectations were indeed baggage. They were baggage that needed to be addressed. There was a need for my husband and I to communicate with one another about these expectations. Because the reality was, many of our expectations didn’t fit the mold of what our marriage would like.

I needed to understand that my husband was not my Dad; his giftings are very different from my Dad and I need to accept and embrace those differences. I needed to communicate my ideas on birthdays, understanding that the ways of celebration and emphasis on such celebration in his family and mine were different. I needed to release the expectation of thinking my hubby should just “know” that I needed quality time with him; I could share with him my needs for this in a way that would benefit both of us. I couldn’t just expect that he knew I longed for him to pray with me; I again, needed to be honest and share this desire with him.

Are you holding onto unrealistic expectations for your spouse? Perhaps holding him to a standard you saw as a child in a romance movie. Maybe comparing him to your parent or grandparent. Are you evaluating your marriage based upon the marriage of your friends, or possibly, by the never-ending happy and unrealistic posts on social media?

Take time this week to check your backpack. What expectations can you release? Or what expectations can you pick out of the backpack, place on the table, and invite your spouse into your world for some meaningful conversation. Perhaps even offer a time of asking for forgiveness for holding onto expectations that should have never made it down the alter in the first place.

Have a wonderful week, and take some time to check out the marriage tips below.  I would love to hear how you were able to work through some of the unrealistic expectations in your marriage. Please feel free to leave a comment or question on the form below, or connect with me on Facebook and Instagram. I also send out a monthly email that includes a devotion, schedule of my speaking, and other words of encouragement. I’d love for you to be a part of what God is doing through the email group. That link is also below. Alright, enough chit-chat. Here are the tips for the week.

Intentional Tips for Strengthening your Marriage this Week:

*Take time alone to consider whether you feel you brought a backpack down the aisle that held expectations for your spouse that shouldn’t have been placed upon him/her.

*Forgive your spouse for placing unrealistic and unhealthy expectations on you.

*Ask your spouse if s/he has felt you had unrealistic expectations for them at any point it your marriage. And if so, do they feel those expectations are still alive or have them been dealt with? Discuss their response.

*Have a conversation with your spouse regarding healthy expectations. What are some expectations you can have for one another that will strengthen your marriage? What expectations do you need to throw out of the backpack?

*Remind yourself throughout the week to release the unrealistic and unhealthy expectations, while focusing on the positive traits your spouse has brought into the marriage.

Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and two granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:

Sign up here for the monthly devotion:  https://mailchi.mp/5bc5d49af25f/2w6akp98cg

Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14 

Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement:  https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064

 Misty Cramer © 2023

Marriage Monday: I'm So Stressed! 

The fatigue has built up from the long day. You’ve dealt with people for hours. You’ve needed to be nice to all those people, because after all, it is your job. You’re already stressing over the list of needs the kids have for the evening. You think…if one more thing goes wrong or one more person says something ******, it will send me over the edge.

Then, you walk in the house and see your spouse has dumped their work stuff in the middle of the living room. You notice the trash they were going to take out yesterday is still overflowing in the kitchen. Your temperature rises as you notice they forgot to put the milk away before they left this morning. If they pop out right now from wherever they may be in this house, you may say things that will take you both on a road to….oh boy, we don’t want to know.

Have you been there? Have you had those days where you are stretched to the limit on your patience, to the point that you are physically and emotionally ready to spew unkind words at your spouse? Almost as if you are armed and ready?

Unfortunately, you are not alone. The question isn’t whether the scenario happens or not (because more than likely, it happens to all of us…or for some, it has happened so frequently that it has turned into the norm). The real question is, how will we respond to the scenario? 

Check out these tips below and surprise your spouse after your stressful day by pausing, praying, preparing, and using the power of your words to glorify God and build a stronger marriage for your family.

Intentional Tips for Strengthening Your Marriage this Week:

*Pause: When re-engaging with your spouse and family after you’ve had a stressful day, pause. Physically pause. Don’t go right in and face the people most important in your life when you are filled with anxiety and stress, ready to blow at any moment. Pause and take a deep breath. Sit for even a minute and gather yourself. Close your eyes. Breathe.

*Pray: Share with God the frustrations you’ve encountered in your day. Let Him know you do not wish to place these stresses upon your marriage and family. Then ask Him to calm your spirit. He is the provider of peace. Allow His gift of peace to wash over you, as He listens and answers your prayer.

*Prepare: The very definition of “prepare” is to make ready beforehand, set up, be established. Allow that to translate to your heart and mind. Anticipating that your spouse may also have had a stressful day can help in this preparation. What does it look like to be ready, set up, and established in reference to connecting with your spouse after a stressful day? Does it mean picking up something at the store and giving it to your spouse as a greeting when you walk in? Does it mean having his/her favorite mug already filled with hot coffee when they walk in the door? Perhaps it means having the kiddos ready to run up and give mommy or daddy a big hug when the door opens. Or maybe it looks having a special meal made. Don’t go to where your mind is tempting you right now, with the “I’m the one that’s had the bad day”. Yes, you have, but it is so amazing what God does to our own heart when we shift the focus from ourselves to our spouse. When we consider how we can make their day better, it honestly will also make our day better. Our attitudes shift when we walk in the door and have a little gift to give them. Our heart posture changes when we have prepared a meal that will make our spouse smile. Our angry words disintegrate as we prepare and make a conscious decision to love someone in very tangible ways.

*Power: Remember, there is power in our words. After preparing your hearts, and moving forward with life-giving actions, be sure to use words that will build up your marriage. God instructs us to build one another up with our words (1 Thes 5:11), and there is of course good reason for that. We build a stronger foundation for our marriage when we speak to our spouse with words that build rather than tear down. Instead of removing pieces of our foundation by spewing hateful words, we are able to add pieces to our foundation with loving, encouraging words. And these helpful, strong pieces will be used for other layers of the marriage to be built upon.

Misty Cramer has been married to Todd for 39 years, and together they have raised five sons. They have been in youth, family, and marriage ministry for over three decades. Misty is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She and Todd reside in rural Michigan. They enjoy mentoring couples, and speaking at marriage retreats, while Misty is also available for speaking at Ladies Retreats, MOPS, and church and community events.

Have a wonderful week.  I would love to hear how you were able to work through some of the stresses in your marriage. Please feel free to leave a comment or question on the form below, or connect with me on Facebook and Instagram. I also send out a monthly email that includes a devotion, schedule of my speaking, and other words of encouragement. I’d love for you to be a part of what God is doing through the email group. That link is also below. Alright, enough chit-chat. 

Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:

Sign up here for the monthly devotion:  https://mailchi.mp/5bc5d49af25f/2w6akp98cg

Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14 

Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement:  https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064

 Misty Cramer © 2023

Marriage Monday: When the Yuck Spreads!

This summer I had a messy science experiment happening in the fruit bowl on my counter. I had some of those cuties in a bowl; you know, the tiny orange like fruit that are so juicy and yummy?

 One day I glanced at my fruit bowl and noticed one of these little cuties had some mold on it. It wasn’t much, so I went about my day and didn’t think much of it. However, having this cutie out of my mind for a couple days was an unfortunate mistake.

Do you know what happens when a fruit with a little mold lies in a bowl with other fruit? The mold spreads. And it spreads rather quickly. It will go from one little green spot on a cutie to infecting a whole bowl of cuties. Sure, the cuties on the top of the bowl still look good. They are still bright orange. But oh, pick them up and you’re in for a surprise. The underside of them will be turning green. And the cuties underneath well they will not only be green, but may be fuzzy and even have some fruit flies on them. All because I didn’t remove that one cutie from the bowl. Darn!

What does fruit have to do with marriage, Misty? Quite a lot actually. Have you had those times in your marriage when something is bothering you and you decide it can be put on the back shelf for a while? Maybe it’s a conversation about finances. You convince yourself that you don’t want the hassle of the conversation, so you attempt to ignore it for a while. Perhaps it’s about the crazy schedule your family is keeping. You decide it’s not a good time to discuss this with your spouse, so you decide to put it on the back burner. Maybe you really need some alone time with your spouse, but it never seems like a good time to bring it up. So, you put the conversation off…one more time.

Soon, the tension from the finances are eating their way into other areas of your marriage. And your schedule issue, well it is creating tension within the entire family, as it spreads from you to other family members. How about that need you had for time alone? Well, that need doesn’t exist any longer because you are too angry at your spouse to even desire being alone with him.

 The issues that began as a little green spot on your cutie have spread. They have invaded other areas of your marriage, even areas that seemed to be going well. By ignoring, putting off, and waiting until another time, you created the perfect science experiment for destroying portions of your marriage.

 As I have mentioned in my other marriage blogs, Todd and I are not people who like conflict. Our temptation is definitely to not address something, and wish it would just go away on its own. However, we have learned to say no to that temptation. As much as we would like to ignore the moldy cutie, our marriage is too important to allow the mold to spread to other areas of our relationship. We have learned to address the mold (the issue) when it shows up. Are you willing to do the same? I guarantee it will be worth it.

Have a wonderful week, and take some time to check out the marriage tips below.  I would love to hear how you made the decision to have those difficult conversations because you acknowledged your marriage was worth it. Please feel free to leave a comment or question on the form below, or connect with me on Facebook and Instagram. And if you found this blog helpful, please remember to “like” it. Thank you! Alright, enough chit-chat.  Here are the tips for the week.

Intentional Tips for Strengthening your Marriage this Week:

 *Consider the areas within your marriage where you have been putting off having a discussion

 *Ask your spouse when a good time would be to have a conversation

 *Ask your spouse if there are any topics in which s/he has been avoiding having conversation with you

 *Listen carefully to your spouse, affirming the validity and feelings of what s/he is sharing with you.

 *Ask God to give you the words and initiative you need to approach any difficult conversations within your marriage

Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and two granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:

Sign up here for the monthly devotion:  https://mailchi.mp/5bc5d49af25f/2w6akp98cg

Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14 

Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement:  https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064

 Misty Cramer © 2023

Marriage Monday: Still Processing! 

A decision needs to be made. A problem needs to be solved. Feelings are shared. Maybe even with a hint of frustration. Questions about how we will find a solution are thrown out there. And then…silence. Yup, this is a scenario that has happened in our marriage and maybe in yours too.

Todd and I are both internal processors. As internal processors, we prefer to make decisions and sort through our feelings and facts in private. And, that often takes some time. I lean toward this way of processing even more than Todd. My silence doesn’t mean I’m not thinking about it. It doesn’t mean I forgot about our discussion. It doesn’t mean I didn’t find our conversation valuable. It just means I need to have time to reflect all by myself for a while. Maybe hours. Maybe even days.

Can you see how that may be frustrating to a spouse if the spouse is what’s called an external processor? An external processor wants to talk aloud. He wants to have conversation, talk through those facts and feelings with another person. Can you see how that could be frustrating for the spouse who wants to have some quiet time to consider things on her own?

As an internal processor, I need to be sure to communicate to my spouse that I have not forgotten about the important conversation; I am simply still thinking on it. And as an external processor, I need to be conscious about not overtalking; I need to provide him an opportunity to reflect quietly if that is what he needs.

Neither of these are “correct”. They are simply different. In order to respond to our spouse properly, it’s important for us to understand what type of processor our spouse is. Otherwise, their way of processing really could drive us a little nuts. 

Do you prefer to wrestle with facts and feelings on your own, within the silence of your own mind, as you come up with an answer to a decision? Or, do you prefer to verbally hash out your facts and feelings with your spouse or someone else as you come up with your answer?

As we remember that neither one of these are “correct”, here are a few intentional marriage tips you can try this week to improve your communication with your spouse.

Have a wonderful week, and take some time to check out the marriage tips below.  I would love to hear how you made the decision to have those difficult conversations because you acknowledged your marriage was worth it. Please feel free to leave a comment or question on the form below, or connect with me on Facebook and Instagram. And if you found this blog helpful, please remember to “like” it; it helps to get the article out to more couples. Thanks! Here are the tips for the week.

Intentional Tips for Strengthening your Marriage this Week:

*Take time to identify whether you are an internal processor an external processor

*See if your spouse will do the same

*Discuss your thoughts on this topic with your spouse

*If your spouse is an internal processor, ask him if he feels you allow him the time he needs to process his thoughts

*If your spouse is an external processor, ask him if he feels he has adequate time to discuss and work through his feelings before he makes decisions

*Decide with your spouse what the two of you could do to respect the processing needed for the other spouse

Todd and I learned about this topic during our Marriage Mentoring Training with Mark and Jill Savage. You can find more about this in their book No More Perfect Marriages, available on Amazon.

Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and two granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:

Sign up here for the monthly devotion:  https://mailchi.mp/5bc5d49af25f/2w6akp98cg

Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14 

Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement:  https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064

 Misty Cramer © 2023

We were given the table by the door. Hmmm. I wondered, “would this be a good spot to have my book table?”  Would it be too chilly for people to stand there, as the wind blew in with every opening of the door? Would there be enough room by the table with others entering the building? I quickly learned, no, it wouldn’t be a “good” spot for my table; it would be the best spot for my table.

You see, a book signing and sales table is about so much more than signing and selling books. I want to share a little with you today about what this is really about from the perspective of the author, or this author in particular.

It’s about cheerfully saying hello and good-bye to every single person who walks in the door. It’s about passing out little Christmas books to children, or having someone grab a piece of candy on their way past. It’s about chatting with people whom you haven’t seen in decades, catching up with them, getting their contact information so you can reach out to them in the future. It’s about visiting with young adults who used to babysit for your children, who are now walking in the door with their own children. It’s about having people stop by and share about your book has impacted their life. It’s about having friends grab lunch for you and laughing and sharing that meal together in the tiny space provided behind the book table. It’s about signing books for a Grandma who has purchased books to give to her granddaughters. And it’s about…

…smiling and greeting two young men when they walked in the door. Smiling back, they passed the table and went to glance around the other booths. Soon it was time for them to exit. After greeting them a second time on their way out, they stopped at my table. Now, I definitely wouldn’t say my book has a target audience of a 20-year-old male. But I would say that God can use this book however He sees fit. With two young men before us (my friend, who was also at the table), we began to chat. One picked up the book and as he looked it over, he shared with us that he too, would like to write a book someday. Interesting. Great discussion starter. We soon found out he was new to the area. Having fallen on some challenging times, he moved to our little town with a friend, hoping to find some stability with his family. Interesting. His friend picked up the book and said, “my Grandma is a Christian. I bet she would enjoy your book.” Another great piece of information to continue conversation. Hearing more about their hopes and dreams for the future, I asked if they would like to give their name and email, so it could be placed in a drawing for an Amazon gift card. (This is something I do at each event, and it has proven to put me in a position of not only gathering information from browsers, enabling me to share my blogs with them, but to also be able to personally connect with them as God leads.)

The two young men dropped their names and emails in the glass jar. YES! After more conversation, I asked them if the two of them would continue to look over my book and perhaps read it, if I gave them a copy. They eagerly responded with a “yes! For sure!” Then I added that perhaps when they finished with it, they could give it to Grandma so she could read it. They smiled and agreed to that, as well. And with their names and emails in my hands, and a free copy of the book in their hands, they smiled and we all said our good-byes.

That is one example of why I love setting up my book table. Oh, don’t get me wrong, it’s great to sell books. My book shares the message of Jesus, so I hope and pray it gets into as many hands as possible. But the table isn’t all about selling books. It’s about those conversations…the conversations between two ladies and two young men who were searching for so much more than a book.

I’m not sure where you two guys are right now. But if you happen to read this, I want you to know our meeting was no accident. It was a God-appointment. And it made my day. I believe He has big plans for both of your lives. I was thankful to be the “table by the door”, so I could greet you not just once, but twice. I am anticipating meeting again, and even introducing you to my husband, my sons, and my friends. All this because, it’s so much more than a book signing and book sales table. It’s an opportunity for God to place people in our lives…and you two young men were on His schedule that day. I hope to one day let you know that in person.

 Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and two granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:

Sign up here for the monthly devotion:   https://mailchi.mp/5bc5d49af25f/2w6akp98cg  

Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14 

Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement:  https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064

 Misty Cramer © 2023

Marriage Monday: Introverts, Extoverts, & Holidays 

The house was filled with people for four days. The table had all its leaf’s in it. Additional tables were added to the room to make sure every person had a seat. From morning to evening there was activity. Games. Movies. Ping pong. Shopping. Conversation. Eating. The list goes on. And my husband, Todd and I loved it. We soaked in every moment. When the weekend wrapped up with a four generation Dance Party in our basement, we couldn’t help but smile. We couldn’t stop the tears of gratitude from forming in our eyes.

And then everyone left; we were exhausted. This takes us to today’s Marriage Monday topic, Introvert or Extrovert. An introvert gains energy and refuels their emotional tank through alone time. They generally prefer one on one conversations to large group ones. They often have a small group of close friends instead of a large number of friends. Todd and I are both introverts. What does this mean for us when the last hugs are given, the waves good-bye are completed, and the last vehicle pulls out of the driveway? I thought we'd give you a little glimpse into our Sunday...with the hopes it may encourage you in your marriage as we all continue with the holiday season. 

Here's how our Sunday afternoon unfolded:

*We looked at each other, embraced, and gave one another a kiss.

*We shared about how wonderful the long weekend was with all who were present. 

*We mutually discussed what the day would hold now that everyone had left the house.

*As introverts, we agreed to give each other space. He worked on stuff outside, did dishes, watched tv, got Christmas decorations out of the closet, and a whole lot more. I grabbed my book orders, my computer, found the kitchen counter once again, wrote this blog, cleaned off the table, and watched some Hallmark.

*We sat down and had dinner together.

*When dinner was finished, we decided to connect again in two hours to get ready for bed and enjoy a movie together to officially close out the wonderful weekend.

*Also, as we passed one another throughout the day, we smiled, shared in a kiss, or a touch on the shoulder…and then went about continuing to refuel our depleted emotional tank.

How about you? Are you introverted or extroverted? Do you fill your emotional tank with some alone time or with other people? What gives you energy?

These are important questions to ask in a marriage. Without good communication, it can get complicated when one spouse is an introvert and one is an extrovert. One person may need some alone time, while the other may desire to have friends over or keep the activity level going strong.

Even when spouses have the same, like Todd and I, there can be hurdles to jump. As two introverts, we need to be sure we are taking time for one another. Just because we can emotionally charge alone, doesn’t mean we should do that all the same time. We need to arrange times to come together, and focus on one another.

And when both spouses are extroverts, they need to also make alone time a priority. They may feel energized by being in larger groups, which could tempt them to solely do activities with others. But they also need to arrange times to come together, and focus on one another.

As with many pieces within a marriage, continuing to learn about one another is so important. There’s always something new to learn and apply to our marriages, as we work to create the very best marriage possible. Remember, neither the introvert or extrovert is correct or better than the other. They are simply different. Check out this week’s Intentional Marriage Tips below:

Intentional Tips for Strengthening your Marriage this Week:

*Identify whether you are an introvert or extrovert

*Have a conversation with your spouse about whether they are an introvert or extrovert

*Share with one another a few examples of times when you feel depleted emotionally

*Share with one another a few examples of times when you feel energized emotionally

*Ask your spouse what you could do this week to help energize them

*Discuss what could be done before, during, and after the next holiday event to help your spouse feel loved, appreciated, and energized

Have a wonderful week, and take some time to check out the marriage tips below.  I would love to hear how you made the decision to have those difficult conversations because you acknowledged your marriage was worth it. Please feel free to leave a comment or question on the form below, or connect with me on Facebook and Instagram. And if you found this blog helpful, please remember to “like” it; it helps to get the article out to more couples. Thanks! Here are the tips for the week.

Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and two granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:

Sign up here for the monthly devotion:  https://mailchi.mp/5bc5d49af25f/2w6akp98cg

Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14 

Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement:  https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064

 Misty Cramer © 2023

One gift. Oh, I waited all week for that one gift. On Christmas Eve, it was our family tradition to each open one gift from under the Christmas tree. During the day one could find me searching under the tree for any gifts that had my name on them. However, being the “rule-follower” I was, I would not disobey the “do not touch” any gifts rule. This made it difficult for me to see if my name was on any of the packages that were buried underneath others. So, I made this concession: if my siblings happened to disobey the “rule” (which I could certainly count on them doing), I would not tattle on them. I’d like to say it was the “Christmas Spirit” that kept me from tattling, but it was actually because I could use their disobedience to my advantage. They move the gifts; I sit behind them and see if I can find my name on any of the underlying gifts. The plan worked quite splendidly. After all, we were all eager to choose the one gift for the night. Our level of excitement exposed our childhood dreams…that one gift was surely going to be something special.

Tonight, we find ourselves just about ready to head into the month of December, where we will begin the 24-day Countdown to Christmas. I don’t know about you, but I get excited about it. I look forward to the month full of all the holiday traditions. I even have some sleepless nights because I am too excited. Yes, that’s a true statement…my husband smiles and nods his head…that’s my girl. It’s just part of who I am; I absolutely love Christmas.

My reasons for this love are vast. Some of them are family-centered. Others tradition-centered. And others Jesus-centered. Most of them are a combination of all three of those areas.

Many years ago, in the Book of Micah, it was written, “But you, Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are small among the clans of Judah, out of you will come for me one who will be ruler over Israel, whose origins are from old, from ancient times.”

That scripture is one of many in the Old Testament that prophetically speaks of the coming of the birth of Jesus. The people waited. They waited for that one gift. They would look for signs. They would listen to the religious teachers. They would anticipate this magnificent gift that would one day come from Bethlehem.

As we countdown to Christmas this year, I will be taking the opportunity to share a story and scripture each day for the next 24 days. They will focus on the much anticipated, eagerly awaited birth of Jesus. I'd love for you to join me on this Countdown to Christmas! Stop by this blog or connect on my social media, and we will do this together. Because the one gift, that one gift given on Christmas Day, was surely something special. It's definitely something we want to get excited about! Let's create an atmosphere of awe in our hearts and our homes, as we countdown to Christmas together. 

Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and two granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:

Sign up here for the monthly devotion:   https://mailchi.mp/5bc5d49af25f/2w6akp98cg  

Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14 

Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement:  https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064

 Misty Cramer © 2023

Day 1: Luke 1

I want you to picture yourself receiving very important GREAT news. I mean news so GREAT that you can’t even believe it’s coming out of the person’s mouth. You are amazed! Dumbfounded! Ecstatic!

And then you respond with, “How can I be sure of this?”

This is what Zechariah said to the angel who delivered the GREAT news to him. News that he was going to be a father after all these years! I think he was amazed. Dumbfounded. And even ecstatic. But he also was like…seriously? Do you know how old I am?

It actually seems like a pretty legit question to me. However, his response wasn’t taken very well. He found himself unable to speak until the baby arrived.

Then we have Mary. She also gets a visit by an angel. The same angel, in fact. The angel tells her she will have a baby. Wow! Crazy news, especially since she is a virgin. Miraculous news. I’m sure she too was amazed. Dumbfounded. And a whole lot more. And she said, “How will this be, since I am a virgin?” Again, I’d say a pretty legit question.

The angel goes on to explain more details to Mary, and then Mary sings praises to the Lord.

If we look at the two questions, they really aren’t very far off from one another, are they? And yet unlike Mary, the angel’s response to Zechariah was that he was made mute. This has me considering the heart of the those who were questioning the angel. If the words are similar, but one of them was considered offensive, I’m thinking there was some “tone” in Zechariah’s response that wasn’t quite right.

This causes me to consider how often my heart, my tone, is not properly lined up with God. I may respond to something someone said or did with a reaction that is offensive. Ungrateful. Unpraiseworthy.

It’s often not our words that are the problem. Perhaps it is our tone. And our tone reflects the condition of our heart. Something we might think we can hide, and yet, who can see our heart? The Lord. He always sees the heart.

As we go about our day, let us consider the condition of our hearts when we respond to the words and actions of others. Will we choose to respond in the tone of Zechariah? Or will we choose to respond in the tone of Mary? I choose Mary. How about you?

This is Day 1 of the Countdown to Christmas Luke Challenge. Join me and others as we read one chapter each day from the book of Luke. Then return here each day for a breakdown of one piece of the chapter. The entire book of Luke is filled with wonderful news, so it is a challenge to choose only one thing per day to touch on, but that’s what I will do. And I’d love to hear what part of the chapter impacted you most. Share in the comments, so we can all learn from one another. Did you read Chapter 1 of Luke yet today? There’s still time! Have a wonderful day, Friends!

Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and two granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:

Sign up here for the monthly devotion:   https://mailchi.mp/5bc5d49af25f/2w6akp98cg  

Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14 

Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement:  https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064

 Misty Cramer © 2023

The last of the visitors left the hospital room. Todd (my hubby) and I cherished a few more minutes of sitting with our newborn baby, soaking in the miracle of birth. We admired his tiny fingers and toes as we unwrapped the blanket a bit. The gift that laid before us wiggled, and made “baby noses” that once again brought tears to our eyes. After one more kiss on the baby’s head, Todd gently kissed me. Brushing the hair from my face, he whispered, “great job, Babe. I love you and I will see you in the morning.” He quietly made his way out of the room, glancing back at me one more time; love streaming from his eyes.

The hospital no longer rang with activity echoing through the hallways. Only the hushed voices of nurses could be heard from across the hall. One look at the clock on the wall told me I should be exhausted. It had been a long day. My body had just birthed another human; that thought still boggled my mind. And yet, the sleep that was calling me would need to be patient. I was holding my baby.

I stared at him. I unwrapped him again, and marveled at this gift, this tiny human that had been placed under my care. Swaddling him once again in the blanket that wrapped tightly around his body, I began to speak to him. And to God, I suppose. After all, it was just the three of us in the room now. I spoke hopes and dreams over this little man. I spoke prayers over this little body. I spoke truth over him, assuring him that he would always be loved…yes, by me. By his family. But most importantly by his Creator. His Savior. He would always be loved. Forever loved.

Our time together, just my baby and I, left me pondering. Wondering what plans God had for this little guy. Our time together, just my baby and I, left me treasuring. Savoring this moment. Storing up every second, tucking it tightly into a spot in my heart where it would remain forever. This moment would etch its way into my heart, marking me in a way that I didn’t fully understand.

That was the scenario for the births of each of my five sons. Those moments during the late-night hours in the hospital truly were a gift to me. When I allow my mind to go back to that place, I feel only peace. It’s as if the arms of God had my baby and I enveloped in His love. It was tangible. As a mom, it will remain one of the highlights of motherhood. It’s sort of strange in a way; because it’s a time that my little men will never remember. A time they will never remember, but a time I will always treasure.

Our reading today for our Christmas Countdown is Luke 2. And in it I found myself relating to Mary. Soon after she had given birth to Jesus, the shepherds made their way to the stable. They were amazed and began to spread the word concerning this birth. And then verse 19 says, “But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.”  The world was hearing about and celebrating the birth of her Son, and she was quietly treasuring, pondering. She most certainly had the heart of a mom; I believe her thoughts went far deeper, far further than the thoughts of the others in the stable.

Years later, as Jesus had grown into a twelve-year-old boy, Mary and Joseph had “lost” him. When he was later found in the temple courts, his parents questioned his disappearance. Jesus said, “Why were you searching for me? Didn’t you know I had to be in my Father’s house?” (vs 49) Following this discussion, Mary once again finds herself pondering. Scripture tells us in verse 51, “But his mother treasured all these things in her heart.” Once again, I see the heart of a mom. Her thoughts went deep. Her thoughts went far. She was treasuring these things in her heart, wondering about his future. What did life hold for him? Perhaps she found herself reflecting back to the moments in the stable. A time when she was able to protect and nurture her son in a way she no longer could do.

I am not sure my exact point with today’s scripture. I only know what God placed on my heart within Luke Chapter 2. He took me back to a place, decades ago, where I had moments in a quiet hospital room with each of my five sons. A place I can never physically go again, but a place that still brings tears to my eyes when I visit it in my minds-eye. A place where God filled my heart with a love for another person in a way that can never be explained. A place where God was so present that I could feel Him pour Himself upon my life and the life of the little man I held in my arms. A place where love and hopes and dreams and prayers seeped out of my pours, landing on the heart of a baby who would never remember this moment, but who would one day catch a glimpse of all that was poured over him in that dimly lit, quiet, hospital room. A place where the three of us experienced a moment in history that would serve as a foundation for the days and years ahead.

My prayer for you today is that you feel the presence of the Lord. I pray you take time to treasure and ponder, as Mary did, about the Son. The Son, who was born in Bethlehem all those years ago. The Son who was born with a love for you that can serve as your foundation in the days and years ahead.

You can find Day 1/Luke 1 of our Christmas Countdown on this blog too. And connect on Facebook or here each day leading up to Christmas for a new message. Thanks for joining in on the Christmas Countdown. Feel free to leave a thumbs up or comment if you're joining me on the Countdown. Enjoy your day, Friends! May you experience the love of the Son today and always.

Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and two granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:

Sign up here for the monthly devotion:   https://mailchi.mp/5bc5d49af25f/2w6akp98cg  

Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14 

Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement:  https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064

 Misty Cramer © 2023

You can find Day 1 & 2/Luke 1 & 2 of our Christmas Countdown on this blog too. And connect on Facebook or here each day leading up to Christmas for a new message. Thanks for joining in on the Christmas Countdown. Feel free to leave a thumbs up or comment if you're joining me on the Countdown. Enjoy your day, Friends! May you experience the love of the Son today and always.

Misty Cramer is an author & speaker who recently released her first book. The Every Day God, 40 Daily Devotions for Walking with God through Everyday Moments, quickly made its way to Amazon's #1 New Release and Best Seller lists in multiple categories. In this book, she authentically shares her own story to remind us all that God has a specific plan, even in the midst of life's messes. She has been married to Todd for 39 years and has five adult sons. While they enjoy their time as "empty nesters" in rural Michigan, they also love visits from their sons, two daughters-in-law, and two granddaughters. Misty sends out a monthly devotion as part of her newsletter, and she'd love to send it along to you. The link to subscribe to the devotion, as well as the link to Misty's book can be found below:

Sign up here for the monthly devotion:   https://mailchi.mp/5bc5d49af25f/2w6akp98cg  

Head to this link if you’d like to purchase the book:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CH258Y14 

Follow Misty on Facebook to receive daily encouragement:  https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063109547064

 Misty Cramer © 2023